preteen parenting: why don't they talk to us?

Parenting is really like peeling through the layers of an onion.

Every time you think you understand something fairly well - you realize there are a whole bunch more layers to it. 

Also, it makes you cry unexpectedly at times.

My middlest child is 12. She's nearing 13 really, and I feel SO not ready. We're in this weird, liminal space where she's so grown in a lot of ways, and still ‘little’ in others.

Even as I imagine hope I'm doing a better job with this one...I peel back another layer and realize, oh, no.

I'm still making mistakes and hurting feelings and being obtuse.

Unintentionally, of course...but as we know from activism work, intent does not count for anything, really - IMPACT is what matters.